A couple of poems I haven't yet posted...

"Mental Overdrive"
By: Kim Hembry©
March 19, 2012

Relentless thoughts invade my mind...
Tossing and turning on the inside...
It's overwhelming.

I feel torn between life, unwilling to cave...
Battling the tormenting pleas - can't seem to behave...
It's gaining strength.

The demands are so strict and won't compromise...
Deep down I don't want to be Ed's demise...
I'm straining for breath.

Yet I try to keep "face" and hide all the pain-
That rages within me; I don't want death to reign...
It's all so intense.

I gasp in disgust as my reflection stares back...
I'm repulsed by a glimpse of the mirror's attack...
I'm shrinking away.

I question whether or not all this will end...
It seems to rise up again and again...
Sometimes I feel hopeless.

Yet I'll lift up my head and refuse to give up...
I'll choose to press on though to do so is tough...
There's too much at stake.


"Battle Cry"
By: Kim Hembry©
March 25, 2012

There's an aching in my heart-
And a breaking in my soul...
So much is stirring within me-
He's promised to make me whole...

The battle that rages within me-
That tears me from within...
Sometimes it seems I'll never-
Come out on the other end...

I'm straining to stand tall-
And not relent the fight...
My flesh shall surely fail-
Yet God fills me with His might...

He's said He's overcome-
He's already conquered the world...
I will choose to claim this truth-
And press on toward the goal...

I won't let fear or doubt-
Come in and override...
I won't settle for defeat, lay down-
Or run and hide...

I will cling to truth-
And I will persevere...
I will surely win this fight-
For my God - my Victor - is HERE!


"Pressure Clench"
By: Kim Hembry©
June 3, 2012

A longing and yearning burn deep in me;
Some kind of emptiness is running deep...
Loneliness creeps in; clouds close overhead-
Yet... I look unto Him.

Feelings of shame accompany the pain-
Disgust and self-hate and such disdain...
I try to press on - never give up-
For... I know He's cleansed me.

A blanket of sadness wraps and engulfs;
The air seems thin, even taking in large gulps...
Yet I feel Him close - His gentle touch-
So... I'm enveloped in love.

Though the pressure's intense, binding me tight-
And the battle's rough - struggle to fight...
I'm reminded He's won - He's overcome-
So... I'll keep standing up.

I'll remind myself at the start of the day...
I'll cling to truth and choose to say-
He's God - the all-powerful One-
I'll fix my eyes on Him - in FAITH!

Wow! Someone's Been MIA... And Another Poem...

So... By the looks of it, I've been quite MIA! This past semester got busy fast -- So busy in fact, that I barely even realized I didn't take the time to blog... I guess it's because I didn't really feel like I had the time to take...

Anyway... Now teaching with my students has wrapped up for the year, and I am now trying to take a little time to "be". Deep down I know I need some quiet time in which I can be restored and refilled because I can honestly say I spread myself a little too thin this semester. (No pun intended!)

Recovery has been quite a feat throughout this semester... I'm still in the race, but I've hit some bumps along the way... Today's actually been a very bumpy day... Below you will find a poem I wrote this morning as I struggled to get up to face today...

"The Smile Hides"
By: Kim Hembry ©

The feelings of self disgust override-
The truth that must be locked inside...

The image reflected back at me-
Is repulsive--can't stand to see...

My jaw clenches tight and locks-
I feel stuck, trapped, and in shock...

My pants are tight; feel them touching me-
I need an escape, some kind of release...

The thoughts that run to and fro within-
They condemn me, saying, I'll never be thin...

I feel out of control, flailing about-
Somehow, it seems, there's no way out...

I'm ashamed of myself and what I've done-
I'm embarrassed to be exposed by the bright sun...

Eating feels like the most terrible choice-
I'm struggling to find the healthy voice...

I feel quite overwhelmed and distraught-
I can't seem to do the things I ought...

I'm afraid to speak up - tell what's inside-
Yet I know it won't help to run and hide...

I feel so close to falling off the edge-
Like I'm being dragged by one leg...

I feel like closing my eyes and going to sleep-
That maybe upon awakening, I'd find some peace...

Yet there's a deep rooted truth that quietly chimes in-
That says, "True peace is found in Him."...

That reminds me that I'm meant for so much more-
That says my value comes from the core...

Of who He made me to be - His child-
The one He chose to reconcile...

Yet with these truths rising up-
I still feel bound and oh so stuck...

I feel alone and tossed about in the waves-
A fresh breath of hope, surely I crave...

For no one knows that all this stirs inside-
For with a smile, I've leaned to hide...

The battle is quite intense right now, and though it's been an overall positive year of progress, there is still a long road ahead of me... I am trying to remind myself that it's...

ONE DAY AT A TIME...
ONE STEP AT A TIME...
ONE MOMENT AT A TIME...
And ONE BITE AT A TIME!