Raging Moment
By: Kim Hembry ©
June 20, 2011
Trying to resist the dark and desperate plea
Trying to resist ED’s beckoning
I promised I would fight tonight
That I wouldn’t give in to the lie
But the only thing that seems to come
Is the thought that tomorrow I can run
To fill the desire that rises within
And still manage to fight to be thin
I chose to deny the cry for release
I chose to stand up to ED’s cunning deceit
But I push through this night, trying to stand up to him
But tomorrow he’ll gain some ground, and he’ll probably win
I’m in need of release, in need of some peace
But how can I keep fighting yet experience some relief?
The strain that rises, the pressure that builds
Seems only to promise hope if I yield
To the voices that scream and rage in my mind
That never cease, that continually bind
I’m so torn inside; yet I don’t want to hurt
Those who are fighting for me to endure
The battle that rages, the fight for my life
The intense, increasing struggle to press on and survive
I’m lost in confusion, trying to seek the truth
But I’m hardly able to stand up to ED’s abuse
The hell that rages, that’s become so real
That’s helped to keep me from being able to feel
The pain that rages, the sorrow within
I’m still fighting the want to be thin
I don’t know how to stand up to his voice
Even though I’ve been told I have a choice
The battle for my life grows harder every day
The choice to show up, not to give up and sway
Only seems to increase, to become more trying
Somehow I never realize that I’m slowly dying
Is it even possible to resist all the lies
Can I really escape the torment and disguise?
There is so much raging in my soul
I’m longing to be heard, to be made whole
Is it possible for me to overcome
The voices that rage inside, the growing temptation to run?
Can I stand up? Can i keep fighting?
Or is it nuts that I’m still trying?
To fight for my life, to keep pressing on
The battle’s too intense and strong
But somehow I will not give up and quit
Because deep down I want to live
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